U and I

U and I
are just two letters
with many others
in between

U and I
have never touched
have barely met
in diurnal time;
U and I
walk side by side
but still so far

U and I
share a role
and share company;
but still,
U and I
remain apart

To be together,
U and I
would be genius;
to put U
beside I -
two parts as one
in equilibrium

If only U
could dream of I;
to meet in dreams
when all is quiet

Fall in love with falling

Some fall in love

with bodies,

some fall for 

an ideal

And some avoid the 

fall at all;

their hearts stainless

as steel

But falling’s quite

the concept; 

see, you’re never in 

control

And though you might

think otherwise,

to fall’s what makes us

us whole

Of course, some land

with impact

and shatter with

a cry

But nothing’s wrong

with shattering;

in fact, it’s worth 

a try

So fall in love

with falling,

and don’t be scared

to break

Because it’s cracks and 

fractures that

the greatest impacts

make

On spraining my ankle at the bus stop

Today, I tripped

at the bus stop

and sprained my ankle

once again

But I got up

and swiped my card;

it turned out okay

in the end

Even though my

ankle was sore,

I did enjoy my

noontime ride

Because the sun

shone, as did I;

no weak ankle will

break my stride

I Build

Nights like these

when my head throbs

and my friends all

are elsewhere

and tomorrow

weighs upon my

brain and pillow

On nights like these,

I build

I build myself

a trojan horse

to lay within

and then emerge

to shocked faces

and smiling friends

I build a song

with chords like fire

and drums like fists

to share my heart

in sound and lyric

I build a meadow

and rocky stream

on which a tree

might someday grow

and I will plant

the first seeds

I build a world

in which I fly

and grow beyond

my body

and its limits

I build my world

with keystrokes

and pen strokes;

with rhyme and

vision; with

fear and false

security

as cornerstones

On nights like these,

I build

Aftershocks (a dream)

Exactly how we met -

the place, the feelings,

the moment in time -

still stands clearly 

in my mind

However, today

it is not important

Similarly memorable

are the years we spent -

the places we saw,

the people we met,

and the nights we’d lay out

combing stars to find Orion,

letting the night wash over

us

But none of that, today

is what is important

Not even the day

I heard the news -

that she’d been pulled

from a three-car pile-up 

at that god damn intersection

on her way home

to me

No, that will not

be discussed 

on such an occasion

What is important today - 

our anniversary - 

is the light she brought

into my world

and that still shines

on my every day

Like a stone slab,

my blinds had become

so accustomed to 

their setting,

that when she came 

to throw them back,

to fill my space with light,

the shock sent tremors

through my world -

aftershocks that

have not ceased

So today -

on the first of these days

that I must spend alone -

I will relish the warmth

of her aftershocks

and I’ll see her face

in the morning light

Hourglass

Even he who moves the clock

must feel time’s unceasing sands

as each independent grain

slips steadily through

his weathered fingers

And even fish of the sea

must sense the waves as they breathe

and unsurely cede their course

And those who run the gamut

from the honored to the damned

must feel the pointlessness of

any effort forcing fate

For all plans and schemes 

will someday weather to sand

and that little second hand

will surely tick on

And though one may try -

as humans so often do - 

no living soul will ever

force the hourglass to still

Everglide

Like a seagull,

you fly over

parking lots;

so high above

nothing but the

home you've known

Like a pelican,

you rest upon

the pulsing waves;

you need nothing

but the fish

and a blue sky

Flap your wings

atop a world

bound to itself

and turn toward

the setting sun

and everglide 

At the precipice

Collectively, we

find ourselves alone

and apprehensive;

all together, yet

wholly separate 

Each of us await

the precipice - and

how fast it has come!

On this, for once, we

we all surely agree; 

and yet, we've never 

felt such disconnect 

All together we

feel the sting of time

whipping past our cheeks -

how we've let it slip

And so we stagnate

hastily, we cede; 

rocks within life's stream

who're wont to float by

alone, yet as one

Ever so slight

Happiness, 

I've felt you

with my fingertips 

Just a brush,

ever so slight,

and never held

I've watched you

from afar, and

yes, I've felt 

jealousy

and wished that

you were mine

Happiness, 

you fickle thing,

the devil's in

your smile

You pull at me

from the corners

of my vision;

so sure to make

your absence felt

Ever so far

and yet so clear,

always on the horizon

but never my own

Marco

You pulled me

across your basement floor

in circles on a rug

I was four years old,

and I laughed

as you did,

and you were strong

I told the other kids

my middle name

was Marco,

and, proudly,

I said that I

was named for you

I saw your face,

smiling as always,

within your name

when I wrote mine

I watched your hair

turn platinum,

but never fall out

You watched me grow,

and never once

were you not proud

You always said

that I was strong

long before I truly was

I watched you as

you lost your wife,

and saw you cry

as you held your daughter

I saw you stand

at your love's grave

and you prayed;

you shed your tears,

but stood your ground

I watched you stand -

strong, composed -

through it all;

a life well lived

You showed me what

I try to be -

always full of love

and always with a smile

Even through the pain,

through sickness

and through fear,

in foreign places 

and new chapters,

you always smiled

I heard today

that you were sick;

I cried for you

and wished that I 

could take your pain

And selfishly,

I wished that you

could never leave

You haven’t yet,

but when you do,

I know that I 

will shed my tears,

But I will stand

strong as you are

and I will smile

because you taught me to

No matter the storm,

no matter the place,

despite the weight

of the unknown

I'll always smile

the way you always have

And, proudly,

I will always see

your face in your name

when I write mine

Chasing Dragons

Below the surface, oft I find

There lies the peril of my mind

And not a thought was so aligned

As those born of fraternal kind

Dreams of laughter, wet with tears

Memories of gone-by years -

I stop myself, and draw a sigh

I’m chasing dragons long passed by

canvas sky

To be as bold
as the fluttering wings
of a dragonfly

Oh,
to be as free
as a leaf that falls
on the burnt end
of a Marlboro

To be as still
as the water
of a silent stream

And to be so calm
in the autumn wind
as clouds creep through
a canvas sky

the silence

It was not 

a woman’s gaze

that turned me

to stone

Was not

the temperature

that turned my

blood cold

And it was not

a cloudy day

that caused me 

to hang my head

It was the lack

of cause

that brought me

to my knees

It was the wind

empty as it came

and solemn as

it left

with no trace

It was 

the silence

that deafened me

and drowned out

all else around

Funny

Funny, how

once you’ve taken

a cloth to your mirror, 

you just might find

that you look

better than you thought

Funny, that;

for here I had

been under the impression

that I never needed

to clean

My head hurts,

my body aches,

and I am sick

in many ways;

and yet, I smile

shed my leaves

I shed my leaves,

for fall has come, 

and it has been 

far too long

since I've shed

that weight

I clear my skies,

my eyes, my mind;

the air has told me

that it’s time

Today is day one

of many more,

and many after those;

today, however,

is special

Because, today

I get the chance

to shed my leaves

and start again;

to face my fears

and insecurities;

my habits and

my self

Today

is day one,

and I

am ready

to begin again

Autumn Leaf

I am a leaf

Without its tinct

One among many

Myself indistinct

Clutched by the arm

Of an autumn tree

Barren and brown

With nothing to breathe

Just like summer

And its dry heat

My color’s gone

My hue's left me

I’m just a leaf

I'm not unique

Like my fellows

On that old tree 

I will fall soon

Inevitably

I will float down

On a fall breeze 

I will lay claim

To grass as my bed

And I’ll lay to rest

A small spot of red

On thousands of blades

Of vibrant green

Their color is theirs;

No color for me

I’ll turn to brown

And I’ll become stiff

And just as with all

I’ll blow with the wind

Worn, colorless

Stiff, indistinct

I’ll be a leaf

Gone by with a blink

In the Moment

Coffee and pop tarts

In an empty house

Cowboy chords ring out

Through the kitchen which

Is lit by golden sun

To an A minor

And as I sit here

And fuck up my scales

As steam lifts from my mug

With hours til my day

I am thankful to

Whatever gears may turn

This world - I am

Thankful, because for

One morning of mine

At 21 years 

I savor this now

For I am at peace

My Nightlight

I always needed a

Nightlight to sleep - Less,

I’d fear throughout the night

Of isolation true

I grew up so afraid

That the cold dark just might

Swallow me up whole

And I would not see light

So as I grew and learned

I bought a desktop light

I plugged it in my wall

And armed myself such that

I might be strong throughout

That ever-fright'ning night

I settled in my bed

And I turned on my light

And yet, I laid awake

Still so l consumed by night

I thought that I’d be safe

But here, alone in dark

I found myself so weak

Still so full of my fear

Of the things lying close

In shadows so unclear

A light may bring comfort

Or some passing relief

But while a soul remains

Afraid, it just distracts

So I stood up and sat

In my darkness a while

And engulfed in my fear

I grew to crack a smile

Spectacle

Oh, spectacle -
that rush of sugar
felt throughout my bones!
The feeling of
new, and rejection
of that which was old!

That which now lies
before me - not
in body, but in
mind, and in dream -
is fantastic,
and must be known!

I with my tools -
so trusty til now -
am at a loss
to describe this

Just know that I
was entertained

Days We Didn't Reach

I dreamt last night

Of many things -

Incoherent messes

Of color, sound

And imagery

- but clearest of all

I dreamt of your face

You smiled at me

And asked my name

And reenacted

How we met

You yelled at me

A callous replay

Of our last days

You made your points

And I made mine

I dreamt of you

In terms unreal

Of days we didn’t reach

I dreamt of sun

And smiling faces

Yours, most clearly

I wanted to run

To grab your cheeks

And kiss you

To fall to ground

And apologize

For all of my shortcomings

To stand up and say

That I don’t need you

And walk away 

Trying to believe it

So many things

That I would do

But I all did

Was dream of you -

Your face, so clearly -

And days we didn’t reach